Ripley

Ripley was a physical abuse victim. She was quick to fear and even quicker to anger, but after the anger came abject terror. It was hard-wired into her. She couldn’t change it if she tried. She couldn’t try because she didn’t understand. It was patently unfair that the coping mechanisms she had learned in order to survive a physical attack were also the behaviours that made her intolerable to others. Although I would stay with her forever, our house was a no-go zone for the many friends I used to have. For Ripley had learnt to intercept violence with violence, and then to pre-empt it, and almost anything could set her off. She was an embarrassment. But most of all she was unsafe. The irony that she was replaying what had been done to her, and hurting others in the process was not lost on me. But I still loved her. I could never let her go. I didn’t think she could survive without me. So as our house became her sanctuary, it became my prison, and one that didn’t allow visitors.

But there was a way out. I could kill her.

You see Ripley was a dog.

A veteran of both a puppy farm and an abusive household, although I could never be sure because all I really knew was that she was a stray. Maybe she was born an angry dog, but the fear in her eyes were real. And it was fear for her life. And I could not live in a world where an animal could be abused and as a consequence of the behaviours she learnt from that abuse, would be deemed a dangerous dog and killed.

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