Preparing to Journal

Hello! I was thinking about this yesterday, I thought I would write it down before I began working on my own journal. Forewarning, I am not a psychologist and if your mental health is so bad you cannot engage with it, seek medical help immediately.

Journaling is such a great, inexpensive, therapeutic tool. If a certain memory or emotion is gnawing away at the back of your mind throughout the day, this is a safe way to not only face it but to express it. Your brain can finally come to terms with demons it’s been trying to escape for who knows how long.

I say inexpensive, because yes you can buy physical books and pens to write in, but you pay a hefty emotional backlash in exchange. You are ripping a band aid off from an open, infected wound but by journaling, you will be cleaning it and setting it on the path to properly healing from the inside out.

The act of releasing all of these pent up feelings can be a lot for your being to go through. I think this is something that is often overlooked, so I want to warn everyone to be prepared to do nothing for the rest of the day, or maybe even the next day. It saps my mental energy, I become fuzzy and lethargic. This is perfectly normal and to be expected.

If you are in a state of extreme distress, do not journal or do any of these right away. Soothe yourself and get to a more relaxed state. You might not even be able to journal if you have expended your allotted energy for the day, wait and feel yourself out.

You might be too tired to make anything after you finish journaling. I try to prep all of my meals the day before so I can catch myself if I get thrown into an emotional flashback. A healthy meal can really help soothe your mind and soul, as well as deliver much needed nutrients to your stressed out body. I find I would get frustrated with myself if I couldn’t cook for myself, making me spiral out of control even harder from hanger. Other alternatives include planning a night out to eat or getting premade, healthy meals. Chicken, broccoli and rice is always a simple staple you can keep, premade or cooked by yourself. I like eating sugarless, protein bars in place of my old go to meal, poptarts. (I’d be lying if I still didn’t crave those delicious things. ) Beware of eating high carb/sugar meals, as they can result in a crash of energy later on. Pair your food with fats to help it disperse out longer.

Nothing bothers me more than having no clothes to wear or a messy sink. Do these before you journal. I find that working through mindless tasks sort of helps me gets my thoughts together before I get to work on writing them. Normalcy and cleanliness also help streamline my schedule and make me less anxious overall.

This is a big one. I realize with journaling comes the emotional toll and the want to revert back to old coping habits to deal with monstrous emotions. To avoid it, I set myself up with my favorite and low stress activities. I like watching shows or reading comics with some tea and a blanket, no matter the weather. Not having any expectations of needing to feed myself or do any chores helps so much with relaxing. Spending time with close friends you trust can also help, even if you’re doing nothing but sitting around in each others’ presence doing separate activities. It helps reassure you that you’re not alone and it can feel comforting to be around others you trust.

I realize with volatile emotions comes riddled with isomnia, but you should try to get to sleep on time. “I don’t have a sleep schedule!!” Well GET ON ONE!! I’ll make a separate post for good sleep hygiene, but to put it simply, knowing how to expect your average day reduces anxiety overall. Sleep helps your mind recover and get back on its feet for tomorrow.

I’m sorry to say, but after journaling, you might think you’re done with those memories and feelings. Unfortunately, since your brain is processing it correctly, you might see a dramatic spike in the vividness of your dreams. It might reawaken a lot of the same feelings you thought you dispelled. Luckily, journaling can save you from this too! I keep a lot of vivid dreams written down and actually use the surreal imagery for my personal projects.

This might seem weird, but it will make sense later on. 30 minutes or 45 minutes is a good start. You can find yourself lost in a void of wanting to express yourself, and even lose track of what you originally wanted to vent about in the first place! It’s easy to slip into the mire of depression, you’re already expending a lot of mental energy to journal, making it even harder to crawl out.

Now that we’ve properly prepped for journaling, let’s get to it!

You can journal in whatever medium you wish. I prefer typing since I need to save my wrist for art projects, but sometimes, I like not being online at all and I enjoy the weight of the ink on paper. You don’t need anything fancy! I use old school notebooks for my journals when I want to write physically. Bonus points if you get something cool like a Lisa Frank or dinosaurs journal. If you do not trust the environment you are in to not snoop in your journals, hide them or write virtually in a private, locked environment. Keep your browser history clean if you are on a shared computer or have others invading your private and personal space. You can also use the private tabs on your preferred web browser. I recommend a password manager to save your usernames & passwords, which you can unlock with a master password. They also provide an auto generator to make complicated passwords, securing your accounts further. Just remember your master password!

It’s tough beginning a journal. Like with any daunting task, it’s hard to find the write way to introduce it. I start with my emotions and my thoughts. It might seem terrifying, but it’s safe with you. Anything my mind is yelling out. “I’m in pain. I hurt. I’m scared. I’m angry.” Anything. I’ve started out journals with a string of expletives directed at people who hurt me. You’re safe in this world to be yourself.

After expressing yourself thoroughly, it’s time to start getting to the root of the issue. What bothered you? What led you to this point of emotional breakdown? I find it can be something as simple as going into a toy store and getting a flood of memories. I’ve been triggered just by people asking me certain questions or behaving in a harmless and innocent manner. It’s not their fault, it’s my abuser’s fault for placing bear traps all throughout the world to catch you later on, even when you’re free. Well air it out! Dismantle these traps! That’s what journaling is all about! ( When I say abuser, it could also mean traumatic events out of other peoples’ hands, like wars or natural disasters. We’re not limiting trauma to any one type here. )

Here’s where the timer point comes into play! Like with art, it’s something you could delve into forever. It seems like it could be refined more and more, your emotions pouring through multiple filters to become the clearest one. If it’s your first time journaling, you might not be able to withstand up to 30–45 minutes of dealing with these emotions. It’s a skill to be worked on as well as a way to let yourself cool off. I like to picture these emotions as hot potatoes in your hands. It’s SO hot at first, spend the time letting them cool off while you rest your hands, then try picking them up again. They’ll become cooler, but your hands will also develop callouses to protect yourself with. It’s two things meeting together in the middle. If you keep burning yourself, you are not going to want to continue working with these memories.

Don’t forget you also need to sleep or eat, so take a break if you’re hungry or too exhausted to go on.

This might seem strange, but, thank yourself for spending time with yourself. Half of the reason these emotions are so strong is because your mind has been yelling at you to deal with them, but also, to comfort itself. My cats grow increasingly louder and more restless when it gets closer to dinner time. They become uncontrollable demons of destruction: jumping around, knocking things off, yowling at the top of their lungs. That’s what your emotions are doing inside of you.

Thank yourself for not only spending the enormous amount of energy it takes to journal, but for giving it the attention it needs. Love and compassion with yourself can go such a long way.

Good luck with journaling! It will be painful at first but you’ll be better off in the long run. It is also an amazing way to help prepare you for sharing your story with those who care for you and coming to terms with what happened to you. It’s an amazing first step, use what helped you to survive during these difficult situations to propel you into the life you want to be in. Free, loved, fulfilled and content.

As with all of my advice, take it with a grain of salt and contact your medical professional first ( psychologist, psychiatrist, whoever is your professional mental health guardian so to speak ).

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